Sunday, January 6, 2008

My Submission

Mystress and i often talk about what my submission means to me..how it feels to me...and why I've chosen this life. Mystress posted a short portion of our chat this morning and one can see...that its been many many years that i have felt this way. At first I was not sure why...I rationalized it as trying to be the best i can be at what i do and if i am told exactly what to do then how could i not do it right...So when a woman tells me to do this..or that..and i do...and i do it exactly how they wanted...they enjoy it so much more and in doing so...i derive so much more pleasure...this Mystress has experienced too...at first Mystress was quite suprised that i could dervice so much pleasure from giving pleasure...but i do...and now Mystress knows why...This is one part of my submission...the desire to provide full pleasure in all that i do...

The second part of my submission...and the hardest part for me to surrender to...is the loss of control. As Mystress has posted in the past...i am always in control...from morning to night and more...nothing happens around me without my input or control...sound like a dom??? Perhaps...but to me...over time it wears on me...and part of my submission to Mystress is giving up this control. Why i give up my control is because it makes me feel very relaxed, in the zone, call it sub space or another mental state. It feels amazing to trust Mystress to be able to give my control to her...she makes the decisions...decides what we shall do...and basically everything i do everyday. When Mystress gives me a command...i don't even think about it anymore...i just react...and its so natural.

Part of my submission is also subduing my stubborness...Mystress and i share a common stubborn trait but to be truly submissive...i've had to learn to subdue it...why...because if one is not open to truly being submissive...and still want to do things ones own way...then whats the use. Surrender to it...hang the stubborness up at the door...and surrender totally to it...for in this surrender its truly amazing to experience full submission.

So to me...my submission is a mindset of surrender...of giving up my control to someone i trust implicitly...of caring for someone so much that i am willing to forfeit my control to give them all the pleasure i can...in all forms i can...and in doing so...making myself and my Mystress very happy...and full of love.

" I am your loving protector, you Paladin, and i bid my deepest obedience and submission to you, my dear sweet Mystress, guardian of my loving heart"

Paladin

2 comments:

Mystress said...

My Beloved Paladin...
That is a truly beautiful post. I am so honored and grateful that you are Myne. I have been blessed indeed to experience the amazing pleasure that you so wonderfully and lovingly provide to Me.

You give much insight into yourself and I am very very proud of you for opening your mind and heart and sharing yourself with Me and those who read us.

You are quite eloquent in your expression and understanding of your surrender to your submission as well. How far you have come My dear pet. I love so much putting you in the zone and knowing how much you need it and how important it is for your well being as I mention in My own post.

You have also done an amazing job in (as you call it) subduing your stubbornness. I am again, honored by your trust and I will in all ways do My best to do the best for both of us.

Know that I recognize all of your amazing improvements and successes since you accepted My collar. The warmth and affection that you have come to radiate at Me being foremost among them. You are.. truly.. amazing.

"I am your Mystress and you are My Paladin. I accept the gift of your submission and your obedience. I vow to guard and protect your heart with all of Myne."

and..

"You are My beloved and cherished property by thy own will and desire. I shall in all ways do My best to honor that which you desire most of Me."

I am in all ways..
your,
Mystress

Paladin said...

Thank you dear Mystress for such wonderful words....it makes me so proud to have you so proud of my progress..thank you.