Sunday, October 26, 2008

Of Gratitude and Changes

Good evening all-

This has continued to be a challenging time for Me, and dear Paladin has continued to be of wonderful support and help to Me at every turn.  

We did indeed have a very important meeting on Saturday, that went very well, and as a result, we'll be moving out of the city and closer to My work, and more importantly, My now widowed dad.  Living 30 mins closer to him will be something I am sure My mother would have wanted Me to do.  Dad can be tough to deal with sometimes, but he is so sad and lonely now.  I have told Paladin, that it feels like My mother has something to do with this.  For years My Knight has wanted to move this direction, but I have fought it at every turn as I have come to love living in the city.  But.. this is amazing opportunity to be caretakers of a wonderful place and some wonderful animals, including horses.. and I grew up on a Arabian horse ranch and I am thrilled by the opportunity to do this again.  My dad loves horses too, and now he'll be able to come visit us and see them.  

Due to the change in plans and getting home late and just being tired, (and the thing I most wanted to wear didn't show up from Ebay in time) we didn't go through with our role-playing plans.  We shall plan it another time.  I did however bind Paladin to one of the doors in the living room dressed in nothing but his blue work shirt I have him keep here and his black restraints, and of course his black training collar.  It was a lot of fun to play with him thus. 

Part of what I have referred to in passing before, as a change we have had here, is that My Knight has been considering collaring a female sub who has been spending alot of time here with him.  She was here when kajira robert was, and they had become good friends.   She liked his collar and restraints and wanted the same.  She had met Paladin before as well, although not for a very long time.

After much consultation between us it was decided that she would as of last nite, here with Paladin and I, be formally collared. She serves as his 'Secretary' as well... and has been of great help both in his office, and here at the house.  She picked up much of kajira robert's duties.  Following My mother's passing she has been very sweet and supportive as well.  I have felt very good leaving My Knight in her capable care while I have been handling the issues in My family after all of this and the changes in My Dad's life now.  I've not been ready to do much in the way of domming her with all else that I have been dealing with.  However, the day of My Mom's memorial, she asked if there was anything she could do to help while we were gone... I said yes, she could clean out the fridge as that really needed doing, but I was simply not up to it,.  Low and behold, she did a super job of it, and it was so nice to come home to.

Paladin has been instructed to refer to her as his 'sister' now, and he knelt closely next to Me as My Knight put the collar on 'C', leaning his head against My shoulder.  The two of them do not interact intimately, but they do share space and time and they both look after both of us.     

This has been a hell-of-a month, and even with his much longer work schedule, Paladin has been there for Me every moment of every day.  He is never further away then a text message.  We have spent more time on the phone in the evenings as I do not desire him to be on the computer when he is not working if he need not be.  Hence, his lack of posts here.  He is supposed to post on weekend's however, and last weekend, he seems to have missed it when I told him so.  So.... on Thur we had a long reminder session.  (smiles)  

This next week will be another very long one for pet, and while I got to see him twice last week, and last nite, I won 't get to this week except for a short visit when he's on his way home from a weekend with family next weekend.  And... his work day is pretty much scheduled to stay this way for the next couple months.  I have to admit, I've become much acclimated to Tue and Thur with him....and I do feel a bit like a kid whose had their favorite toy taken away... but there is nothing to do but accept it and be patient...

We will continue to interact and be the best team we can be together...and hope that things will smooth out sooner rather then later.

Wishing best to all in all ways,
Mystress

Friday, October 24, 2008

Busy times for all

Evening all.

Times are still busy for Mystress and I. We are doing very well and Mystress is getting over her tough times with things getting back to normal.

Some exciting times possible on the horizon for Mystress and i ask all to send her the best of luck with a meeting tomorrow. I know i will flood the meeting with good thoughts.

Hope we still have our guests and our activity here shall once again start to pickup.

paladin

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Catching up again....

Good evening dear visitors,

Tis been another rough couple of weeks for Paladin and I.
His has been a continuing late work schedule. Myne has been dealing with the passing of My mother and helping My dad.  

Please bear with My rambling some. My mind is working better then it was but I'm doing some free form tonight I think.

Firstly... gratitude to My wonderful pet.  
He gave Me a wonderful, wonderful 'birthday' weekend.  I got to spend three pleasure filled nites with him and two wonderful days. 

Paladin is very humble when he says simply that My computers are working again.  He neglects to say, that super subby came to the rescue yet again.  They are only working because of him.  He spent hours on Saturday working on My dying pc....finally figured out that the fan in the power supply was stuck. He took it apart, cleaned it, and magic, that problem was fixed.  It had been slugglish.. he cleaned it out and now it runs very snappily along!  

Then.. on Sunday.. he took Me out to a wonderful breakfast on the way up to my parents place where I was picking up My mother's computer according to My dad's wishes.  I knew that I was in no shape to do this.. and so My dad got to meet "Our dearest friend".... and Paladin got to meet My dad... but... most importantly.. he was able to untangle what turned out to be a spaghetti mass of wires (Mom loved computers and photography) pack it up safely and neatly in his car, and then figure it all out at our place and get it working much faster then I ever could have. And this was his first Mac experience too.  So... this is one of the ways that Paladin serves Me in his submission.  I wonder how many other subs do this wonderful service for their Owners?  

Friends....I can't begin to tell you what having Paladin has meant to Me during this time.  Even when he's been hectic at work, he has always taken the time to text Me to check in on Me.  He even took off early (for his current schedule) last nite so I could be with him the nite before My birthday. And this morning I was awaked with him saying "Happy Birthday Mystress" over and over as he kissed Me all over. Mmmmmmm... a super start to this day.

On another topic...

Paladin has expressed his being not too 'keen' on the idea of being in costume at the groups Halloween party.  He has never, ever been to one and never been in a costume of any sort.  In looking through many of the options out there, I knew that I have no desire to have him be anything less then who he is, or what he knows or is comfortable  with being.  Truly the flash of Paladin in a rainbow wig and red nose was only a flash.  Which, in truth it was.. because he is so unsuited to be dressed like that.  I may be silly sometimes, but Paladin is not a silly person, and I'm sure that's one of his reservations about going in costume when I first told him about it. In fact.. his text when I asked him if he was free for the party that nite was "I can clear that day if I don't have to wear a costume".  Hmmmmm.. .I wrote back "setting conditions on your Mystress are you?" "no Mystress" he sent back.  
hmmmm no... and THAT's when I had the flash of the rainbow wig. (smile)

However.. being an Owner of a sub like Paladin means that I am responsible for maintaining his best interests at all time.. and sometimes, that mean subduing My own silliness for his benefit. 

Once I knew we were going to the costume party, it didn't' take much pondering for Me to decide who he was going to be.  Someone he has been for Me before. The only time we have done any 'role playing' of a truly fictional sort.  Some readers will remember perhaps our evening where he was a captured Roman Centurion.   I certainly enjoyed that evening.  I have told Paladin that I want him to be in role for the whole of the evening unless I decide otherwise.  This way it gives him plenty of time to think more about this character.  

As for Me... that I'm not totally sure of.. I have a couple of excellent ideas.. and I think one may throw Paladin for a bit of a surprise, but I am quite looking forward to the evening.  

We have had some new developments in our household, but I think I will leave those for the next entry.

All in all, so far, its been a nice birthday.. I miss My mom a lot though I have to say... first year with no card from her.. or her voice... but.. I am writing this to you on her computer.. (smile) So this is her best, and last present to Me.

Please tell your loved ones how you feel while you can. 
Thank gosh Mom knew I loved her lots!

Best thoughts to all,
Mystress

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Wonderful weekends and busy times

Evenig All.

The weekend draws close to an end and what a wonderful weekend it was. Mystress spent the weekend here as her birthday weekend and we had a wonderful time. From our normal Thursday night together to a long weekend of lounging and entertaining ourselves...hmmm what wonderful entertainment.

We lounged about, cuddled, shared baths and much much laughter...something my Mystress has needed of late. We made plans for the weekends to come...we are going to be attending a Halloween party with the group. It should be fun but the dress up part i am not to keen on...going with the flow.

Mystress got all her computers fixed up this weekend too sho Mystress can get back into the swing and explore futher with a kick ass new computer too.

As the coming week approaches it promises to be a busy one once again but Mystress and I shall stay in tough as we always do.

Hoping the week goes by quick...

Paladin

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Evening All

Mystress has infact beaten me to sharing the news with our wonderful guests.

I wish that things have not been so hard for my Mystress as of late yet as life often does, life threw Mystress a dozen curve balls all at once and Mystress has handled them as best she can considering.

As Mystress's SSSS as she says, i have tried my best to be there for my dear Mystress whenever she needed it. Its been tough for sure for I tend to avoid these situations. Don't know why, just always have. Guess its because i don't like how they make me feel so i choose to not deal with it. But this time i had another duty. I had to stand firm for my dear Mystress, to be her willow tree. To allow her to rest her head and take comfort in her reliable safe spot. I do hope that Mystress found some respite from the situations even if just for a moment. My only regret is due to my work schedule i could not give Mystress as much support as she needed and wanted.

To my brother Robert...best wishes to you on your renewed efforts. I wish you the best and hope that it all works out for you.

So is life and so it flows...the times are not over for us yet together we will get through them.

One thing that i should be able to fix...is Mystress's desktop :) Somthing i have some experience in. Time will tell and next weekend Mystress and I spend the entire weekend together relaxing and veging and ... ummm cuddling :)

Love to my Mystress
Paladin

My pet rock.. aka the Super Submissive Support System

Which My dearest Paladin has been in spades...

Hello dear readers...


Been one heck of a bumpy ride.

Of all things that have happened in the last week, Paladin has been the one constant solid thing.
All other things have swirled like the sea around your ankles, pulling back to sea bits of your life. He has held Me in his mind and heart all through this, like the giant weeping willow tree that lives on the huge rock he has chosen to represent him. Tall, strong and yet comforting and implacably solid. He has come to Me and knelt before Me, holding and comforting Me and allowing Me a safe place to let all of My feelings out unconditionally. He is very wise and has given Me some sage advice, and given Me the strength to get through this difficult time.

A bit of an update....


My mother passed away a week ago today. It was a pain filled time that I am slowly coming to grips with, and doing My best to heal and move past. My goal is to deal with each thing as spiritually as I can.

At the same time, kajira robert has left to go and try and mend things with his wife, and I wish him all the very best at it. I hope that they can find a renewed partnership that will bring them both much joy. But I will always be here, watching over him and keeping up on things with him.

And now, My dear ex-Master is very ill yet again and weaker and sicker then I've seen him. Tis been over a year since the staph infection ate into his shoulder and left him ravaged.
As I write this, My Knight has taken him to the emergency room yet again as it looks like the staph may be in his ankle. We pray not... that this is something less viral. I wait to hear what happens.

At least My Knight is doing better and that is good.

Oh.. and least I not forget it, My desktop computer seems to be having a meltdown. I got a great new "N" wireless card for it, but it didn't seem to work and now the darn machine keeps turning itself off after an undetermined amount of time. Grrrrr.. and we all know how those computers can affect us. Paladin finally had to suggest, strongly, that I just leave the machine alone and use the laptop for a while. But I LIKE My desktop!! I want to be able to speed around Second Life at full rendering speed. Now I am thwarted! Paladin has told Me that if I bring said sick computer over to his place next weekend when I am supposed to see him that he'll see if he can figure anything out. Yeah.. like I really wanted to spend a weekend alone at his place working on the darn computer. Hmmmm.. maybe I'll make him do it naked. (smile)


Paladin is currently in the midst of a long project of long days and nites. Yet with all that, he's never been further then a text away. His ever steady support has been a life saver. Because of his intense work schedule and computer time he has had to do, I had told him to belay writing here on the blog until today when I have asked him to give an update. I think I'm a bit ahead of him at it, but I still want him to write his perspectives and how he felt as a submissive serving in this sort of capacity.


These past couple of weeks Paladin has served in ways that I never expected I would need. All through my mother's short illness he has made his home open to Me any time I needed it.... culminating with Me and My Knight going to him directly after My mother's life support was removed and I waited for her passing. Suffice it to say that was some very bad energy that was spewed on Me and drove Me from My mother's side where I had intended to be. Immediately after arriving both My Knight and Paladin agreed I needed a shower to get it all off. I asked Paladin to wash My clothes as well which did. All of that helped some. Getting the negative energy washed off as soon as possible certainly helps to move past a difficulty so that the remnants of the shock is not longer clinging to you.
Paladin as an engineer was able to explain to Me how engineers (My parents both being engineers) react in some circumstances, especially those they are unfamiliar with . Because of My years of hospice work, I had more familiarity with all of this then My family did. Anyways.. it was all very difficult, and yet, Paladin was able to help comfort and explain things to Me that genuinely helped Me.

I cannot speak of the details of what happened as they are too painful, but I will say that having both Paladin and My Knight hold Me while I grieved certainly helped. His home is very very peaceful and we managed to have a quiet bubble together, just the three of us.. our own little family it felt.. and I could feel the blessing of being so loved by these two, and feeling the merging of their energy in their love of Me.

My Knight respects and cares for Paladin and feels strong in knowing that Paladin will always look after Me.
The two rings I wear, each a promise to Me from each man of their love and dedication to My well being is something I try never ever to forget to appreciate.

The leaving of robert has been very very difficult as well. But it was something he needed to do, and he is still Myne. So far his texts have been that things are going well. I hope and pray that his wife will appreciate him finally as the great guy that he is and that she needs to love him and thank him for all that he does, as I tried to do so much when he was here.

This is My birthday month, and for the first time, I'm not very cheerful about it. It was My Mother's too.. two days after Myne.. this year, we are holding a celebration of her life on it.

I feel..... numb in some ways. I am trying to appreciated all the things I have and the good things coming along.

On a house keeping note.... I deleted some links that were not around any more or hadn't posted since last year. Always sad to do that.. and I wonder what happened to some of them of course. Or those that have gone private. So, I also added some new links from places I found on sites linked to us.


Well, I think that is a pretty good catch up of things from My perspective for now.

Continued good wishes to everyone out there!
Mystress